Mid-Twenty and Still Awkward

I'm smooth, calm, collected, and always prepared to say the right things to win someone over. Ha! That's all until I leave my lonesome and wake up from my debonair fantasy. Whenever I see a cute girl, I turn into a bumbling du-mass with a knack for saying things that leave her confused and both of us awkward.

This ain't no movie. In real life, writers say it all on paper so they don't have to say much in person. If someone was blessed with charisma, they would spend their time mingling through the social circuit rather than typing throughout the twilight hours in their barely Ikea-furnished abode.

I think most people believe in their own social ineptness. Some people compensate by lifting weights. Other people attract a partner by obtaining status or great wealth. A few blessed people have a kick ass sense of humor that warms and woo's. But I ain't buff, I gotz no money, and despite all appearances...I can get nervous like a whore at church when talking to unfamiliar people.

Ugh. Damn the rules that demand men be the social facilitator! Seriously, it would be nice to have more women be a bit more proactive that are NOT the typical around the block and back again skanks, or the all too common women that are desperate to escape the confines of their dysfunctional relationships. I'm not part of the stereotypically caricatured male gender that plagues popular media. I don't model my life after music videos. Fake boobs and a phat ass are all good for the teenage libido...but it's the occasional poignant expression that truly giddy's the nerd in me.